So I was taking a walk around the neighborhood earlier today (my car is in the shop, so I was forced to use my legs to get places just like poor people), and I saw something weird. There was a car sitting on the side of the road. It was smoking, and the occupants of [...]
Archive for March, 2008
Mel Gibson was right. He tried to tell us, but we didn’t listen!!
Posted in Miscellaneous, Real Life Ridiculousness, tagged gasoline prices, Mel Gibson, post-apocalyptic nightmare, Road Warrior on March 31, 2008 | 3 Comments »
The Dark Side of Politics (UFIA)
Posted in Politics, tagged assault, election, Hillary Clinton, Obama, Politics on March 27, 2008 | 2 Comments »
Well, here we are in another election year, a time that always gets the blood pumping for many Americans who are eager to steer their country towards hope and prosperity for the future. When the majority of people think of elections, they visualize balloons, hand-shaking, baby-kissing, and ticker tape parades. It is a time of celebration [...]
Little Known Movie Review #2
Posted in Little Known Movie Reviews, tagged Andrew "Dice" Clay, Die Hard, movie review, worst movie ever on March 27, 2008 | 5 Comments »
Wow, I didn’t plan on doing this twice in a row (in fact, I have another “bun in the oven” that I’ve been working on, but I may or may not “abort” it in the near future), but I just can’t skip out on this next masterpiece of overlooked American cinema. I apologize to those [...]
Little Known Movie Review
Posted in Little Known Movie Reviews, tagged California dreamin', Jack Black, movie review, worst movie ever on March 24, 2008 | 6 Comments »
As a recurring feature on this blog, I will occasionally select an oft-overlooked classic movie to review so that I can enlighten you sad fucks to some of the higher cinematic art that you have been missing. Hopefully this will inspire some of you to get off of your fat, lazy asses and go [...]
A College Student’s Senior Thesis that I Found on the Side of the Road
Posted in Sex and the City Makes Me Vomit, tagged CHiPS, Erik Estrada, Sex and the City, Who's The Boss? on March 18, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
The Madonna or the Whore: Portrayals of Women in Modern Television
by Colin Stallingsworth, Sigma Epsilon Chi
Not to sound too Jerry Seinfeld, but what is the deal with the portrayal of old women as whores on TV in the past few years? Back in the golden age of television, older women were always protrayed on TV [...]
Yet Another Open Letter to the Creators of VFTW.com From My Attorney
Posted in Legal Matters, tagged American Idol, lawsuit, Vote For The Worst on March 14, 2008 | 25 Comments »
Dear Sirs,
Using my astute lawyerly powers of observation, I have noticed that you have posted my letter in the Mail Bag (although you should change the name to “Male Bag”, because you guys are totally gay and would probably enjoy that) for all of your readers to see. That is good, because I secretly embedded some spyware [...]
Stamps and other postal matter.
Posted in Miscellaneous, tagged loser, Marilyn Monroe, philately, stamp collecting on March 11, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Yeah, I’ve got a few hobbies here and there, mainly in the form of collections. Let’s see, I have a collection of Archie Comics going all the way back to his first appearance in Pep, I’ve got a collection of shot glasses from every city I’ve ever visited (I don’t drink the alcohol, but apple juice [...]
Own a Piece of Shit… I Mean, A Piece of Musical History!
Posted in Real Life Ridiculousness, tagged boy bands, Lou Pearlman, pedophile on March 8, 2008 | 4 Comments »
Ladies and gentlemen of the intarwebs, you have only just under two days left to try your hand at a chance to own several pieces of musical history! As you may or may not know, the creator and former manager of the Backstreet Boys, ‘N Sync, O-Town, Aaron Carter, and a lot of other horrible [...]
An Open Letter to the Creators of VoteForTheWorst.com From My Attorney
Posted in Legal Matters, tagged American Idol, lawsuit, Vote For The Worst on March 8, 2008 | 28 Comments »
Dear Sirs,
In reference to your website with the address of http://www.votefortheworst.com, my services and legal expertise have been retained by an organization of concerned members of the public, Troubled Watchers of American Television (or TWAT, for short.) This group of viewers, both young and old, have taken great umbrage with the purpose of your [...]
Hail To The Voix de Ville!
Posted in Politics, tagged George W. Bush, jazz hands, press conference, vaudeville, White House on March 7, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I usually shy away from political discussion in this blog, as is evidenced by my one other post, which clearly contains no political references whatsoever. You see my point. However, an announcement was made yesterday that has truly rocked the foundations of the political world, and I cannot withhold comment. At a press conference [...]